Tag: wfhm

Self-Love: A Biblical Perspective

by starkeycoaching, posted in christian, Christian Women, Encouragement for Mom

Growing up in the south, we ALWAYS heard “love your neighbor as yourself”.

In my life, it was often put in the light of “go above and beyond for everyone and put yourself last.” That’s the exact opposite of what Jesus is saying in that verse. I was shown over and over by other’s actions that loving myself and wanting to do something for myself or something that brings me joy=selfish.

You can’t take care of others if your cup is empty. You can not do the best for others if you do not do the best for yourself. You aren’t meant to work yourself to death, day in and day out to please all the people.
God did not create us to be used and abused by ill-intended people.
God created us for relationship with Him. He loves us. He cherishes us.

Loving your neighbor as yourself means loving yourself is NOT a sin. Taking care of yourself? Also, not a sin. You have permission to love yo’self! Jesus wants us to do the best to take care of us and our temple, and THEN we can love others the same way.

Just like on the airplanes we are taught to put our oxygen mask on FIRST, and then help others. That applies to ourselves in our day to day mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health as well.


I’d love to hear in the comments below how YOU fill up your cup and show yourself some love!

Being Present with the Kids

by starkeycoaching, posted in Kids

I despised it. There are so many things to do and soooo little time. I work for someone else part-time. I own my own business. I volunteer. I also have a home to run. My plate is FULL.

The LAST thing I wanted to do was sit in the floor and play with dolls. First of all, I don’t wanna crawl in the floor just to play a game I’m not interested in playing. Secondly, I need to be writing this blog post or cooking dinner, or doing laundry, or the never-ending dishes. Thirdly, every time I play with them, they don’t like how I am using MY imagination and then I get bossed around. BLEGH.

Then one day it hit me in my feels. They’re only little for a few more “minutes”. One day they’re going to storm past me and slam bedroom doors as moody teenagers, refusing to talk to me about anything going on in their lives. As I contemplated these things, I realized: it doesn’t have to be that way. I see my children ALL the time. We are WITH each other, as a homeschool family, all the time, but I was not being present. I would go to my room to work on my computer/my own business. I was the moody teenager! “I need to be left alone so I can work!” “No, Mommy can’t play because she has to work.” “No, Mommy doesn’t want to play.” When I wasn’t yelling at them, I was shutting THEM out. I felt so convicted, shameful and downright awful. I decided right then and there I was going to do things differently from here on out.

I started being super silly and fun again. I do sometimes play dolls with my daughter, but generally she’s pretty agreeable to ANYthing she gets to do with mom. I’m yelling less. The kids are fighting less. We all conversate better. It’s almost like, we are a peaceful, “normal” family now. Say what!?

Putting in a little bit of specific, 1:1 time with them NOW, just puts an awesome foundation in place for your relationship with your children for the rest of your life. You are making them feel as special as they are. They are feeling your love and your CHOICE to lovingly CHOOSE your child. That’s so awesome, Mama!

If you related to any of this at all, and know it’s being put on your heart to be more present with your kids but you don’t know where to start, grab my free 5 Ways to be Present with your Kids guide right here!.

Overworked & Underpaid

by starkeycoaching, posted in Encouragement for Mom

As a mom, you wear many hats. You are the cook, the maid, the chauffer, the butler, and if you homeschool, also the teacher. Ah, and let’s not forget you also have a husband. So many people wanting and needing so many things from YOU. All the time.

You can’t truly understand and appreciate all that moms do until you become a mom. I recently read that if mom’s were paid for ALL we do, we would make at least 133k per year. That we-YOU- work 98 hours per WEEK as a mama.

Let that sink in for just a second.

That is a lot of work for nobody to see all that you do.
God does. He sees you because He is walking with you.
He appreciates all that you’re doing for Him and your kids. He tells us we will be rewarded in heaven for our good deeds. What is “gooder” than being the best mommy for your kids!

You are amazing, courageous, loved, seen, and strong.
Repeat that to yourself today and every day until your brain starts to believe it!